In 2010 I started taking yoga classes at the local cultural centre. It was something I wanted to do for a long time but didn’t get to. Or couldn’t get to. Now looking back ‘wouldn’t get to’ is more accurate. I was coming out of a period of apathy. During this time I forgot I was a self-starter, had abundance of energy and went after what took my fancy. Yoga rightly represented my coming out of hibernation. It was time to pick myself up and move on. There was no plan or purpose. There was only urge to keep moving. The kind of work I did back then mirrored this theme to keep moving. Work was interesting and made me feel like I could do things that matter. Simply that I could do things. It vastly helped with my mental state. I was eating better. My appetite was improving. So, yoga fit right in with the then ME. yoga was the right thing to do at the time. It was my kundalini. Did yoga come first or my epiphany? I don’t know. What came first chicken or egg? yea 🙂

What took you so long

Couple of years ago before this, I had taken the first steps to start yoga classes at the same cultural centre. However, resonating with my general life tune at the time, it didn’t take off, or I would find excuses not to. Or, I think now, there were practical obstacles why I couldn’t. The application sat below my desk pad for years. The first yoga class I ever took before all of this; even before this ‘to be or not to be period’ was unpleasantly linked to an experience I was refusing to process. It wasn’t violent. But it was linked to a traumatic experience. Because I wasn’t processing it, it just sat there posing as another obstacle why I couldn’t get with yoga. It was trauma until I processed it, I realized later. I’m not trying to belittle our struggles. But our shadows are only as big as we make them

I did it

When I finally started taking yoga classes regularly from 2010, it was a turning point for me. I have moved past something I was avoiding to process. My journey on improving my mental health began like this. Without me realizing it or giving it a name. And it took me several more years to actually speak to a therapist.

Yoga Gives Back

The changes I noticed with practicing yoga came in small measurements. And they were all physical at the beginning. Or I was too obtuse to pick up the more subtle changes. To date, I’m not sure what is it about yoga which makes one more expressive. Maybe it just reminded me that I used to be more expressive. Nor I’m sure what aspect of yoga that makes you more malleable in thinking and more creative in problem solving. My job required me to work with limited resources and called for a truck load of improvisation. I’m wondering whether, did yoga help me with all that? It’s fair to conclude that, the practice helped me shed things I had picked up over the those gloomy years. It also helped me with my anxiety induced inventions. It was helping me to help the Lost Boy. I was humbled in my body’s abilities and limitations. I was called to attention, to come back to my body because it was easy for me to be a hummingbird in the clouds, to get lost in a head-space. It was my grounding. A simple physical practice, yet it was making all these subtle changes. Righting the course. For; all of us are natural in the form of yoga

I was back

Looking back, it was disgustingly simple to do the right things. Small things. Sometimes getting the head out of it is the most trying thing. We plan too much. Think too much. We get so caught up in the ‘management slogans’ and try to put too much structure to things. Because we are responsible adults and that’s what we should do, right? Err… I’m not too sure anymore. All it took was to get started. From somewhere. From where you are. Yoga always welcomes you at where you are. You may even start it because it’s the latest fad in the workplace. Or because those pants look alright. Starting it for whatever the reason is the vital part of the whole thing. You may even let it slip momentarily. But chances are that you’ll get back to it. And it’ll be awesome when you do. You’ll pick up from where you stopped. You’ll be ready

Will you let yoga?